listening to the low moan of the dial tone again

today i was the biggest retard.
so big i burned my thumb on the car's cigarette lighter.
my writing thumb.
this is not the whole story.
it's so ironic that when i actually want to go to therapy for the first time in my life, there is no money for it.
they are still here, these dresses. i am still putting them on
and putting them on.